Let Go and Let God!

Did you ever wake up one morning and realize that you were in a different "place" than you ever thought you'd be in life?

Back in January of 2005, my husband lost his job due to downsizing. At the time, I was doing extra-event childcare at our church. Through that job, I met a friend who has become so precious to me. It is only just recently, in looking back, that I've realized what a guardian angel she has been to me - indeed, to our whole family. Knowing that we needed the financial help, she went out on a limb, and encouraged me to apply for the "crafts" job at our church's day camp that summer. I applied, and got the job.

I went back the next summer as well - helping out with crafts again.  It was the perfect summer job for me, as our kids could also attend the camp while I worked. By the end of that summer, my friend offered me another job in Kids' Ministries starting that fall. The job was to coordinate our Wednesday evening girls group. After some prayer, and receiving support from my husband, I took the job.  In my mind - I would be working with girls in grades 1-6.  That was good for me. 

Well let me tell you - that job was NOT AT ALL what I  expected it to be, but in some ways, it turned out to be so much more!  As the leader, my job was to recruit teachers to fill the positions, and then to meet their needs on Wednesday nights so that they could concentrate on their time with the girls.  I planned the year's calendar, and organized events for our group.  The job ended up being more about ministering to the volunteers who carried out the program.  I said as much one day to my friend (you know, the one who had offered me the job.)  Her response?  "Would you have taken the job if I had told you you'd be ministering to women?"  She already knew my answer: a resounding "no."  I couldn't imagine myself in that particular role.

Today, I was talking with another friend, and related to our discussion she said, "God is so sss-smart!"  It was almost hard for her to get out -- hard for her to admit.  We laughed.  Because, really?  Why are we so surprised when things work out well -- as if God hadn't ALWAYS had our best interests at heart?

God was not surprised when there were women who came to me with tales of unemployment.  He knew I would understand them, and know their fears.  God was not surprised by the woman who gave one of her kidneys to her husband.  Maybe he thought I could be a cheerleader for her.  He wasn't surprised by the women who have shared family or financial struggles with me.  He wasn't surprised by two different bouts of cancer for another woman -- knowing that we would prepare meals to help her family get by during her treatments.  God knew each friend I would meet along the way.

God wasn't surprised by any of it.  Still.  I am amazed.  I am in awe of the experiences that God has allowed me to have in (and because of) this role.

All this to say what?

It's not to toot my own horn.

It's to encourage you.

NEVER underestimate where or how God can use you.  It is my natural tendency to be unsure, to say, "I can't..."  And I am not wrong.  In my own strength, I CANNOT.  But the times that I have "let go, and let God,"  God has allowed me to be a part of things I could've never imagined.  He has increased my self-confidence and has also given me rich friendships because of these experiences, and I will forever be grateful.

And about my "guardian angel" friend?  She would probably tell you she knew all along that things would work out, and that I "had it in me."  And I would believe her.  I'm sure that God whispered the whole thing into her ear.